I’m about to launch a personal project that I expect may be of interest to quite a few out there: I’m planning to tackle my money issues – in public!
I have decided to use my life as a living laboratory. I want to credit Molly Gordon (author of The Accidental Entrepreneur) for expressing this concept in a recent interview with Isabel Parlett (the “Soundbite Shaman”). Molly said she decided to be transparent about areas of her life where she might have felt shame or defensiveness, and that made for rich learning and teaching for herself and her clients and followers. I felt relief when I heard her say this, of not having to pretend to “have it all together.” The idea of someone in public modellng being honest, vulnerable, and human seemed both courageous and healing.
So in the interests of Science, in the spirit of curiosity and experimentation, and with whatever degree of transparency I am able to muster, I am embarking on an exploration of this biggest bugaboo of my life. . . .
I, like so many others, have deeply-ingrained, semi-conscious or unconscious limiting beliefs and self-images having to do with money, that have restricted my earning capacity and held me back from playing a bigger role in the world – until now.
Now, through much personal transformation, in my middle years, I am moving to the next level of my career, ambition, and creative expression. I am ready to play a bigger game, step up, take risks, be visible, and make a difference.
Yet I can feel these limiting money beliefs and self-images sticking in me, pulling at me, tripping me. I realize they will continue to trip me and keep me from reaching my full potential unless I confront them directly. And not just my earning potential, but how many people I can help, how much difference I can make in the world, everything I want to do and be.
Several years ago, when I entered the coaching profession, I looked online for coach trainings and noticed that most devoted a significant chunk of their curriculum to marketing. As a “good” spiritual helper/healer type, who had always shied away from anything resembling tooting my own horn, I at first recoiled. But I did a quick double-take, saying to myself “Oh, that’s why I’ve never succeeded! (Duh!)”
I then and there recognized that learning to promote myself was my next soul-task, and I vowed to devote myself to it in the spirit of fun and play. When I learned that Internet marketing included writing and speaking – two of the things I most wanted to do – I knew I was in the right place!
I have spent the last few years happily immersed in learning many creative techniques for marketing using the Internet. And although there are still lots of challenges for me there, I have a new comfort-zone where it comes to promoting my products and services.
So now I have a new soul-task that I am ready to commit to – an even higher hurdle: my money issues!
Stay tuned and watch this blog for what I hope will be many future installments of this bracing adventure.
This is great and beautiful to boot!
Thanks.
Thank you Jan, for your heartfelt support. It means a lot to me. – with love, Tomar
Tomar,
Bravo for a brilliant blog post and the courageous journey you are embarking on! The money blocks are so insidious, and reach far into many other areas of life as well! I am with you at least in spirit on this endeavor, and perhaps on my own blog as well!! I want to acknowledge this mighty first step!! Woohoo!!! — Nancy Farris
Thank you so much for your support, Nancy. There will be many opportunities to join me, in spirit and in actual practice, as I move forward. May we all have the courage to face our demons and liberate the beautiful potentials of our souls that are being called forth. – Tomar
Well, I believe in everything else you’ve done, so I am behind you. The whole thing sounds scary, though. If anyone can do it, you can. I will be following your journey with great interest.
I confess, not a comfortable arena for me……to say the least.
Blaze the trail!!!!!
bless you,
another Nancy
Thank you for your courage and commitment. I’m sure we will all learn from your bold endeavor. May your creativity and brilliance bring you to new levels of financial abundance that you so richly deserve. Thank you for your honesty and your desire not only to serve your own wonderful soul, but to inspire others to open to their financial abundance as well.
Hi “another Nancy” (aka http://www.NancyJoly.com) –
I know it’s scary. That’s why I’m excited. I can’t explain why it has this effect on me. It feels like some living organism of life process and communication is right here – and it’s thrilling. It’s open-ended and unknown, and alive.
Thank you for believing in me. I believe in you too, totally! I value your love, your support, and your beautiful healing grace.
love you –
Tomar
Hi Donna Poler – great animal healer –
Thank you for your beautiful words. You are a blessing as well. May you prosper as you so richly deserve, as well. – Tomar
Tomar,
Thank you so much for the attribution. Marketing (and yes, making money) are indeed soul tasks!
Molly
Thank you, Molly, for your inspiration.
Years ago I would never have credited that money and marketing could be soul tasks – yet now it seems so obvious. It is often said that Earth is a school for souls. To get promoted to the next grade we need to master the curriculum of the one we’re in. (Well, it’s not exactly linear.)
Not only that, it can be fun as well. What was I so afraid of?
Tomar
Tomar,
This is truly a soul-journey to live out in a complex world. I’m excited for you, and I am excited for all of us who can be inspired by your courage to share and reveal your process in an authentic way. I am immediately inspired to pick up on a quest that I started last summer (but let get derailed after that–largely in the pursuit of stabilizing my income (!) after a big gutsy career and life change!): I have a growing list of women–in different parts of the U.S– eager to participate in small focus/discussion groups (kind of like the T-groups of the 70’s) about our experiences, attitudes and (limiting) beliefs about money, wealth creation, and the like. Just to see what commonalities we share, as well as what differences and nuances are present among us.
No specific outcome agenda other than to see how the power of sharing openly and without limits, creates the conditions for something new to come into being. I long to help share the power of women’s voices and experiences regarding money and our sense of place in the world, through my research, writing and continuing entrepreneurial work.
I’d love to talk more with you–and other commenters here (Molly, Nancy1, Nancy 2…others?) about this. A very important conversation to open up to the light of day and the possibility of Blooming!
I look forward to your teleclass this afternoon too! (now I need to go in search of the link to get on!)
Blessings,
Thia
Thank you, Thia.
What a beautiful vision you present, of small thoughtful groups of women honestly sharing their experiences, beliefs, and feelings about money to shine light on a dark corner. Maybe that will become the next wave of consciousness-raising groups. I think we’re ready for that.
I invite all sharing and participation here, of course. But maybe there is something more that will grow from the seed of your vision. I think there already are groups like that starting to sprout here and there. The movement to help third-world women enter the economy and become self-sufficient (which I strongly support) may be adding to the general energy of awakening to money among women everywhere.
Do you want to start a blog and invite those women on your list to engage in that discussion online? I love the idea.
Tomar
My husband & I are having financial challenges. He has provided for our family for the last 20 years. He is burnt out. I am a Health Coach and know that I can make a difference for others as well as make money to provide for our family. We have 3 children and 2 are in college. I am very anxious about money lately. When business was good, we led a nice lifestyle. We are not destitute but it’s time for me to step into my power and shine.