Healing Money Wounds

We all have money wounds – have you noticed?

Often we think we’re the only ones. If we feel inadequate about money – as many people do, especially women – we generally keep it to ourselves.

Money is one of the main things people feel shame about, and naturally we hide that shame. We all tend to think everyone else has it together, and we’re the only ones “pretending.”

Actually, our culture is wounded about money, so how could we not be?

Most of our wounding we inherit from our families, often passed along from one generation to the next. We absorb pain and anxiety about money as we grow up, maybe hearing our parents fight about it, or being scolded for wanting something they can’t afford.”I’m not made of money,” I used to hear as a child.”Money doesn’t grow on trees.”

Or maybe it’s the opposite problem. Perhaps we were indulged and given too much by our parents, who either lived on credit cards, or were determined to give their children everything they had lacked. Either way, we wind up not knowing the value of money, perhaps even feeling weakened, not developing the muscles of self-reliance that come  from making one’s own way. By being given too much, we have been robbed of something essential we truly need – our own strength and confidence.

There are so many wounds around money. Some of them are universal. Nearly everyone in our culture believes that they don’t have enough – even rich people feel this way, I’m told. And the more you have, the more you can fear losing.

Even though the saying goes that “money can’t buy happiness,” we act as though it can. And we’re encouraged by the media to want more, to crave things, to engage in a feeding frenzy of acquiring.

We’re taught to measure ourselves and value our worth by our money and material goods, and to compare ourselves to others. Our insecurities are exploited by advertisers to get us to spend money to feel better about ourselves. Hence money becomes equated with what will heal our ills, what will fill our lacks. By this very function of money, it becomes associated with our woundedness.

And the spiritual creative types among us, who reject material values, are just as wounded. We suffer deprivation, feel disempowered, and often lack the respect that our more outwardly successful neighbors get.

None of this is our fault. We can’t help being conditioned by the world we live in. It’s hard to find the right balance, to achieve a healthy relationship with money in our culture.

What is needed is a balance of the spiritual and the material, an awareness of gratitude for all that we have, and a dedication to serve the world in the ways our soul came here to do – and to be recompensed for our service.

Humanity is growing and changing. Our relationship to money, both individually and culturally, collectively, are among the focal points of that change.

What will the new world look like in regard to money? The decisions we make today in our awareness, our actions, and our relationships, are contributing right now to that new world!  What choices are you making? How would you like the new world to look? What choices can you make to create greater health and balance in the all-pervasive area of money in our lives?

What Does It Take to Succeed? The 3 Keys of Success.

 

I’ve been thinking a lot about what it takes to succeed. Perhaps you have too.

And I’ve come to certain conclusions. Some I’ve known for a long time, some are new awarenesses. I want to share some of these with you now.

 

Here are the basics:

  • Purpose. When you connect to the deepest motivation of your being, the thing you were born to do, to be, to give – you actually turn on the power source within you that will propel you forward beyond all obstacles. When you really “get” what your inner purpose is, and say Yes to it, you will start the process of aligning your energy, heart, mind, and actions around that forward momentum, to become unstoppable. When your actions line up with your soul’s reason for taking form, doors  open  for you, synchronicities show up, and your path is made clear. Because your soul is on board, the spiritual realms open up to help you. It’s a magical experience!
  • Clearing Blocks. However, most of us have all kinds of resistance, fears, doubts, hesitations, or reasons why we think we can’t or shouldn’t go forward, even if we know our purpose. We make things hard for ourselves. We each have our personal bag of “stuff” that we drag around with us, that defines who we think we are. Our “stuff” keeps us stuck in the same old place no matter how much we try to change. If we do not do the work to clear those blocks, we will continue to walk in circles, in our familiar limited patterns. The good news is, it is possible to clear them – if you know how.
  • Vision Plan. Once you know your purpose and clear your blocks, you need a concrete vision to bring into manifestation. You must take the high inspiration of your purpose and ground it in reality, by seeing the possibilities for living it in the world. From those possibilities, you must identify and choose the one that calls to you most, commit to it, and start taking actions. This is where you shift from Inner to Outer Action. And once you commit to engaging in action, there are pathways to follow and secrets to learn. The main secret that I have learned is this: Don’t give up!

Those are the Big Three, the central Keys to Success. Without any of them, you won’t get very far. Without clearing your blocks, you will continually stumble. Without a clear vision and plan, you won’t have a map or a destination. And without aligning with what your soul is here to do, you may achieve surface success, but it won’t be satisfying.

There are many other specifics that may be relevant to your personal success. For me, some of them have been deciding that it’s really okay to live on the Earth plane, and being willing to cooperate with the laws of physical reality  – for instance, those irksome limits of time and space. That includes clearing clutter, keeping agreements with myself, showing up in a responsible way.

For you those particulars may be different. We each have our history, our self-images, our lifelong limiting beliefs, and they all come up to be worked on and cleared when our goal is to bring our purpose and vision into manifestation. In fact, there is no more intense or accelerated path to self-growth and personal transformation – I highly recommend it!

Another thing I highly recommend for each of those steps is that you have a guide or wise companion. The habits of the ego will just not let us take certain steps if left to our familiar self.

I would love to be your guide on your journey towards inner and outer success.

If you would like to engage in a process of discovery to see where you are in relation to the Big Three – give me a call and we can talk – for free. You can easily contact me here.

What If Your Beliefs Are Really True??

I‘m interested in transforming limiting beliefs. Beliefs about money, success, self-value, as well as many other things that people hold limiting beliefs about.

There is much talk about beliefs in the air these days, in the healing and self-help communities  – and that’s a good thing.

Yet a client challenged me recently and asked if it were accurate to speak of beliefs – even limiting beliefs – if what you are believing is really true. Why call it a belief if it’s true? Isn’t there a difference?

I thought that was an interesting enough question to answer here. It made me think.

What is a belief, anyway?
Is it an opinion? Is it a deeply held conviction that I defend with my life? (We see a lot of that in the public arena – in politics and religion.)

So here’s what I came up with: A belief is any concept about reality that you hold as true and which therefore determines how you view yourself and life, how you feel, think, and behave.    Continue reading

Money & Soul – the journey begins

I’m about to launch a personal project that I expect may be of interest to quite a few out there: I’m planning to tackle my money issues – in public!

I have decided to use my life as a living laboratory. I want to credit Molly Gordon (author of The Accidental Entrepreneur) for expressing this concept in a recent interview with Isabel Parlett (the “Soundbite Shaman”). Molly said she decided to be transparent about areas of her life where she might have felt shame or defensiveness, and that made for rich learning and teaching for herself and her clients and followers. I felt relief when I heard her say this, of not having to pretend to “have it all together.” The idea of someone in public modellng being honest, vulnerable, and human seemed both courageous and healing.

So in the interests of Science, in the spirit of curiosity and experimentation, and with whatever degree of transparency I am able to muster, I am embarking on an exploration of this biggest bugaboo of my life. . . . Continue reading